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Tag Archives: love

This May Have Just Saved Me

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Love.

In it’s most intrinsic form.

The overwhelmingly warm rush of joy that starts in your chest, spreading and flowing through every inch of your body.
When the warm rush fills every inch of your body, it’ll beg for freedom, exploding in a form of a smile.

When he’s with me.

I finally belong.

You were different from the rest.

You chose me. Out of everyone. I chose you, because you were special. You were different. Amazing.
You took my breath, you kissed it, you wanted it.
You held my hand, fingers entwined, promises.
You took my time, sweet nothings, false dreams and hopes
You stopped my heart, stole it, broke it.

You broke the perfect mirror image I built of you and it shattered in broken pieces around me.
I step in the broken fragments everyday, wondering what went so wrong.

What happened to you, what happened to the other half of me? We were one, a team, a unit.

And now

There’s nothing.

Worse than strangers.

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I fear I’ll never find love, which is stupid and naive. But knowing that you are stupid and naive does not cancel out the fear, it doesn’t cancel out the worry and the longing to find it – even though you’re so young.
I’ve heard many a times ‘Once you stop looking for it, you’ll find it’ but I don’t think I’ll ever stop looking for it. I want fingers between the spaces of my own, I want a boys warm breath on my cheek whispering sweet nothings in my ear. I want to feel like the only one, and them to be the only one too. I want to feel my heart racing, the rush of blood to my face that I’ll want to hide. I want to be lifted up and him to never want to put me down.

‘I want doesn’t get.’
Too bad really.